NETZACH: KIDDUSH LEVANAH קִדּוּשׁ לְבָנָה

KIDDUSH LEVANAH קִדּוּשׁ לְבָנָה :

– PRAYER OF CONSESSION ON LAST QUARTER MOON

28. I SHALL NOT DIE BUT LIVE
    I heard in 1943
    In the verse, “I shall not die but live,” in order for one to achieve
    the truth, there must be a sensation that if one does not obtain
    the truth, one feels oneself as dead, because he wants to live.
    This means that the verse, “I shall not die but live” is said about
    one who wants to obtain the truth.
    This is the meaning of “Jonah Ben (son of) Amithai.”
    Jonah comes from the Hebrew word Honaa (Fraud), and
    Ben (son) from the Hebrew word Mevin (Understands). One
    understands because one always examines the situation one is
    in and sees that he has deceived himself, and he is not walking
    on the path of truth.
    This is so because truth means to bestow, meaning Lishma.
    The opposite of that is fraud and deceit, meaning only to receive,
    which is Lo Lishma. By that one is later imparted the “Amithai,”
    meaning Emet (Truth).
    This is the meaning of “thine eyes are as doves.” Eynaim
    (Eyes) of Kedusha (Sanctity), called Eynaim of the Holy Shechina
    (Divinity), are Yonim (Doves). They deceive us and we think that
    she has no Eynaim, as it is written in the Holy Zohar, “A fair
    maiden with no eyes.”
    The truth is that one who is awarded the truth sees that she
    does have eyes. This is the meaning of “A bride whose eyes are
    handsome, her whole body needs no scrutiny.”

-Baal HaSulam, Shamati, page 85